Wedding Wednesday: Candid photos from the Kentucky Derby wedding

Y'all, the wedding is finally over! I can sleep at night! No one has sent me an email about table dimensions! I have 30 mini bourbon pecan pies in my freezer!

The professional photos aren't ready yet, but I thought I'd share a few candid shots taken by various guests. 

Hats were embraced by all.

Seersucker suits made an appearance.

Even Baby Henry had a good hat.

Bowties were a popular option.

I got tired of smiling for photos.

No one got tired of petting ponies.

Gina was totally cool with a crowd.

I got to see some of my oldest and dearest friends.

Including my very best friend, who went riding with me
the day before the wedding, because she's awesome.

It was a long day with some minor hiccups that ultimately didn't matter. I have a huge sense of relief now that it's over- I can go back to normal life!

Wedding Wednesday: Offensive things

After last week's post seeking advice about the bachelorette party, I started thinking over all the things that have offended various people connected to the wedding. The list is full of hilariously trivial things, so I thought I'd share them with y'all.

• My aunt was offended my first cousin (her daughter) didn't receive an invitation to my bridal shower. My cousin lives in upstate NY, which isn't exactly next door to Tulsa, OK. I didn't have the hostess send her an invitation because a) I didn't want her to feel obligated to come, and b) I didn't think she'd care. Besides, if she'd showed up, it wasn't like I'd kick her out of the restaurant!
• My mother is extremely offended we aren't having a dance floor at the wedding. (This is still puzzling to me.)
• Johnny's sister is offended she hasn't been asked to help or consult on any part of the wedding. She lives in Denver, CO (also not next door to Tulsa); I haven't asked her to help because if I wanted someone to help from 500 miles away, I'd ask my best friend Amy.
• Johnny's grandmother is offended because Johnny's second cousin who lives in Dallas, TX wasn't invited to the wedding, but his second cousin who lives in Tulsa was. For the record, we've seen the cousin in Texas once in the last 5 years.
• My mother is offended I am not wearing a long, Disney-princess kind of dress.
• My father is offended that a Kentucky Derby themed wedding means his wife won't let him wear his standard wedding attire of black suit, red tie.

Why do weddings make people totally insane?

Wedding Wednesday: Bachelorette etiquette

My best friend and matron of honor Amy texted me last week to inquire about a bachelorette outing on Friday night before the wedding. I don't want some big drunk thing (I am post-collegiate, grown-up Stephanie these days) with tiaras or strippers; I'd really like to have a low-key night of bowling at a cool place downtown, get home fairly early, and feel well rested for the wedding. 

Amy asked who I wanted to invite, and I've been mulling it over for a few days. I obviously want to invite my friends and sorority sisters who are coming from out of town and my local friends (who will probably decline to come because there's a horse show the day of the wedding). Here's what I want to know, though: who do I have to invite? Johnny's sister? My sole female cousin? Johnny's second cousin who lives in Tulsa and might get kind of weird if she's excluded? 

I don't want anyone's feelings to be hurt, but I also don't want to spend the evening with people I don't really like. What do y'all think? Just invite who I genuinely want to spend time with or try to keep the peace?

Wedding Wednesday: Less is more

Johnny and I truly envisioned our wedding as basically a large version of our normal, annual Kentucky Derby party where we also got married. What typically happens at the Derby party? Some assortment of people show up, wearing any variety of clothing and/or hats. I prepare way, way too many snacks. Alcohol beverages are consumed, my Thoroughbred racing enthusiast friend Holly educates everyone on which horse we should cheer for, the race is watched, everyone goes home.

Weddings apparently require a little more finesse. Things I didn't know were things until they were mentioned to me include:

• Ushers
• Decorations for buffet tables
• Programs
• A person to man the guestbook
• A dance floor
• Assigned seating

The two biggest points of contention between Johnny and I and various family members are a dance floor and assigned seating. 

Johnny and I don't like dancing. (Well, you know, other than the extremely silly kind.) We've never wanted to have a first dance or dance with our parents at the wedding; personally, I'm still burned out on ballroom dancing from years of Junior Cotillion. We aren't planning to have our DJ play songs that prompt dancing- he's basically there to keep background music of smooth jazz running and make the occasional announcement. We were pretty clear about this from the get-go, but I guess everyone thought we were joking. Four different family members have expressed their displeasure at this decision and/or whined about how other family members will be sooo disappointed.

My thoughts are that if you are so compelled to dance, you can find a place to do it in between tables. The venue won't be totally stuffed or crowded, so if the sweet sounds of a saxophone move you to dance, go the fuck for it. 

The other thing that's recently come up is the idea of assigned seating. I think (and have always thought) assigned seating at weddings is stupid unless you're having a plated meal where there are multiple entree options. (If that's the case, I imagine it would be difficult for wait staff to know what meal goes where!)
I've never had a positive experience when I've been assigned a seat a a reception. The most memorable time was at wedding a couple of years ago: Johnny and I were seating at a table of other 20-something people, presumably because we'd have things to chat with them about. Two people spent the entire reception engaged in an extremely uninteresting conversation about starting a food truck ("Did you know you have to like, get a food handler's permit? Bummer!"), while another guy gave us the cold shoulder after Johnny made a joke the guy found unfunny. 
I'd much rather let people sort things out for themselves; how do I know who they want to sit with? As an example, let's take my youngest uncle. He has a wife and a son; his son is around the same age as my oldest cousin's daughter. Would my uncle prefer to sit at a table with my cousin and her family so their kids can hang out? Would he prefer to sit with my mom (his sister) and their brother? Would my cousin rather sit with her parents and brother? I have no idea.
My feelings are that less is more with this whole wedding; if people can't sort out a place to sit or contain their dancing urges, they have greater problems than I can address! 
What do y'all think? Have you had to find your own seat at a wedding? Was it terrible? Are you still able to function as a human being? Do weddings bring out your inner break dancer?

Wedding Wednesday: Hat

The wedding is somehow five weeks away. Johnny pointed this out to me last night, and I broke out into a fit of hysterical laughter. April is absolutely jammed with horse and work related events, and I've been so focused on those things that I haven't given any thought to the wedding. Well, other than celebrating the joy that is my hat.

Selfies in a large hat are hard.

I ordered my hat a few weeks ago from Kathi at Hat-A-Tude, who was an absolute pleasure to work with. She sent me a sample of the hat's material so I could make sure it matched my dress and the turnaround time on the hat was quick. 

As soon as the hat came in, I promptly stuck it on my head and paraded around the house for the rest of the night, proclaiming that I planned to wear it every day for the rest of my life.

While I haven't exactly gone that far, I am super excited about it! In fact, this is one of the only things I've been super excited about. (The other thing is desserts.) 

I've also be happy to hear from various family members and friends that they've been shopping for hats and are looking forward to decorating them and wearing them for the wedding. I'm thrilled so many people are truly embracing the Kentucky Derby party aspect of this thing!

Wedding Wednesday: How to assure others it's under control

The wedding is only two months away, but I'm totally unworried about it. Really. We've got:

• A venue
• A photographer
• A plan for food
• A plan for desserts
• Flowers
• A DJ
• An officiant
• Favors
• A dress + hat for me
• Plans in place for the horses to be there

As far as I'm concerned, we're good to go. Unfortunately, not everyone involved seems to feel that way. I'm talking, of course, about Johnny's mom and my mom. I've mentioned before that his mom has been very helpful in the planning process and has truly helped with a lot of things. I've appreciated having her assistance, but now that we're getting down to the wire, she's getting worried.

A couple of weeks ago, she sent us this long, crazy email filled with long, crazy things that mostly boiled down to "You aren't prepared, why did we think this was a good idea to do it ourselves, WE SHOULD CALL THIS WEDDING PLANNING COMPANY IN TULSA THAT SPECIALIZES IN CRISIS MODE EVENTS!"

Let me be clear: we are not doing this ourselves. More power to those of you out there who can arrange your flowers yourselves and make adorable party favors and paint props for a photo booth and have your wedding for like, $500. I admire and respect you. I, however, don't find that appealing at all. (Well, the $500 part is appealing, I guess.) Johnny doesn't either, so we've simply sought out vendors that will do all of those types of things for you. And we feel confident in their ability to do them!

Any advice on reassuring our mothers that we actually do have everything under control? You know, without sounding like a bitch?

Wedding Wednesday: When you don't like a vendor

Finding vendors for a wedding is easy. Johnny and I attended a wedding show in Tulsa last summer, which was filled with vendors for everything from cake to bridal boot camp. It's a very efficient way to gather information and compare prices. We found our photographer, printer, venue, and DJ through the show, and even got a discount on a few services because of wedding show specials. 

For the most part, the vendors we've worked with have been great. Our photographer understands that we want many pictures of the horses and knows how to shoot them. Our venue has been absolutely accommodating and pleasant. The print shop has been enthusiastic about our ideas and easy to communicate with via email. (That's important to us.)

The DJ, on the other hand...

When we chatted with the representatives at the wedding show, they were funny, relaxed, and seemed to understand we were looking for a company that could provide MC services and music in a low-key way. We aren't planning to have dancing; we're planning to have a short ceremony, a cocktail hour to watch the race, and dinner. I'm hoping to be home by 9 PM. The reps we spoke with seemed into that. 

A couple months later, we set up a meeting to go over the contract and put down a deposit. We were greeted by a man who was not someone we'd spoken with at the show. He was unprofessional and bordered on rude. He wasn't sure of our names and asked if we were the winners of some kind of contest. He accused me of not replying to emails or answering calls, neither of which I'd received. He dropped "retarded" into the conversation more than once, which I thought was offensive and an odd choice to use with strangers. Despite all this, we signed the contract and put down a deposit anyway; we'd liked the people at the wedding show a lot and figured this idiot couldn't possibly be representative of everyone at the company.

Yesterday, we met with the DJ company again. The meeting was at noon- when I'd contacted them about the meeting, the receptionist told me that they only set up meetings between 10 AM and 4 PM at their office, which is in a very inconvenient part of Tulsa to both Johnny and me. I took the entire day off work (which is unpaid) and Johnny took an extended lunch. I was under the impression we'd be meeting the DJ who would be performing at the wedding and going over generalities like genre of music desired for the reception, wedding time, etc. 

We met with a young woman who informed us she was not our DJ and she didn't know who our DJ would be because she couldn't access network files because something was wrong with her computer. She asked if we had any specific song requests for various parts of the wedding (e.g. processional, recessional, etc); we didn't, because we weren't informed we needed those at this point. She promised to email me an Excel form and we could fill in songs, write notes, and send it back. She explained that we'd meet with our DJ a final time approximately 2 weeks before the event to finalize everything.

Basically, the meeting accomplished nothing. It was a waste of everyone's time. I cannot understand why they wanted to meet in person. I am annoyed that their representatives have been unprofessional and disorganized. The only productive thing that came out of this meeting is that I very firmly informed this young woman that under no circumstances did I want the man we met with last time at our wedding. (If he's the person at the meeting before the wedding, I will tell him to GTFO.)

I am hesitant to seek out another DJ company; we're getting fairly close to the date, and I know May is a popular time for weddings. But I also don't want this company to do something stupid like play Michael Bublé on loop throughout the reception. Other than having one very abrasive employee and being into pointless meetings, they haven't done anything seriously wrong; they've just been really annoying.

What do y'all think? Should I give these guys the benefit of the doubt? Should I start searching for another company? Did you have any terrible vendors? Is it appropriate to punch that idiot guy in the mouth next time I see him?

Wedding Wednesday: Changing your name

Wedding planning is...going. I've sent half a dozen emails to half a dozen different people regarding the wedding. I've acquired addresses of friends and relatives I didn't know I had. I've set meetings. I feel like I'm pretty on track, all things considered.

Today's topic is a question for y'all: Did you change your last name when you married? If you're not married, how do you feel about changing your name?

Personally, I am ambivalent about it. I have zero ideological qualms about changing or not changing my name. My concerns are more practical: changing my name on legal documents seems like a huge pain in the ass. Changing my name on things like my bank account, Netflix account, and USEA card seem like somewhat more minor pains in the ass. What about things like my email address, which has served me well since approximately 2006? And let's not talk about how many items I've monogrammed with my current initials.

Opposite of this problem is the problem of not changing my name. Will that be a pain for other people? Will it matter if someday, someone writes a check to "Stephanie Lauderdale" instead of "Stephanie Peck" and I can't cash it? If we have children, is it going to lead to weird assumptions and/or questions if I have a different last name?

I'm curious to hear your thoughts on it. 

Don't even suggest hyphenating, y'all. Fifteen characters is too many for me.

Wedding Wednesday: What to register for when you have everything

Johnny's aunt is hosting a wedding shower for me in March; she emailed me yesterday with a few questions, one of which was "Where are y'all registered?"

This isn't the first time I've been asked that question; in fact, I've been asked so many time that I finally created a small registry at Williams-Sonoma. It has about 5 things on it.

Before living together, Johnny and I were separate, functional individuals with complete sets of dishes, cookware, silverware, sheets, and towels. (True story, we have two identical Dutch ovens.)  In the five years we've cohabitated, we have accumulated even more dishes, cookware, silverware, sheets, and towels. We have a food processor (we have two, in fact: a mini and a full size). We have a stand mixer. We have a blender. We have a slow cooker. We have a great cutting board and knife set.

The only things we could really use are an immersion blender and a cast iron skillet.

I understand that people want to wish us well by purchasing a gift. I think that's nice, and I appreciate their generosity; however, I do not want to register for things I don't need or want. I also don't want to end up with 8,000 picture frames (I've already received four as engagement gifts...one has a picture of the horse in it already) because no one knew what to get us.

What do I do, y'all? 

Wedding Wednesday: Food

Somehow, my wedding is only 5 months away! Yikes! I feel like we still have a lot to get done, even though I had a semi-productive weekend of chatting with a florist at Whole Foods about table centerpieces and inquiring about custom mint julep fudge for favors from a local business.

The venue is also doing the catering for us, and we meet with them in about two months to discuss what we'd like on the menu. We're planning to have 2 or 3 passed hors d'oeuvres for the cocktail hour during which the Derby will be broadcast, as well as having a buffet-style dinner for our guests.

While I imagine the venue will have some suggestions, I'd like to have an idea of what type of food we're interested in before we meet.

At the annual Derby party, I typically go nuts on hors d'oeuvres; I don't serve a dinner. Previous years' offerings have included fruit skewers with sweet dip, deviled eggs, pasta salad cups, pimento cheese with crackers, buffalo chicken spring rolls, spinach artichoke dip, crudités, and, of course bourbon chocolate pecan pie. 

I could eat ALL the deviled eggs.

Since I obviously won't be the one doing the cooking this year, I'm exploring more creative hors d'oeuvres options. I'd love to do miniature hot browns, like these found on Epicurious:

It speaks to me.

These watercress canapés from Southern Living are beautiful: 

And every single one of these crostini recipes is mouthwatering:

Most of our guests are easy to please eaters, and I know no one's coming just for the food. (They're all coming for the mint juleps.) However, a few guests are vegan or have allergies like nuts or seafood. I understand you can't please everyone and shouldn't try, but I don't want anyone to feel like they're going home hungry. I'd love to hear your suggestions and feedback on that kind of thing!

I'd also love to hear your ideas on dinner options. Johnny's mom has asked about 'traditional' Derby foods; my only thoughts on that are hot browns and burgoo, neither of which I care to serve for dinner. Johnny's in favor of barbecue, but I'm afraid it'll be a little messy for guests, what with all the sauce. (Maybe I'm paranoid because I can't make it through a meal without getting something on myself.)

What do y'all think? Have you had some truly awful wedding dinners? Do you even remember the food? What about really excellent meals?

Wedding Wednesday: Honeymoon

Over Thanksgiving, Johnny's grandmother offered to give us a cruise for our honeymoon as a wedding gift. Through some kind of timeshare/Marriott rewards program, she can redeem points for such a thing. I don't know all the details, though I do know that only certain ports/cruises/destinations are eligible. We're very grateful for her offer.

Is this what cruises are like?

But...neither of us has ever been on a cruise. I've always thought they sounded fun (though maybe not so much after reading Lauren at She Moved To Texas's recent post on it!), but I also think they sound like Johnny's worst nightmare. He's not a people person, he definitely isn't interested in clubbing on a cruise ship (or elsewhere), and he's not a big fan of drunk people or small children.

However, we don't really have an alternative plan for a honeymoon. We'd loosely talked about taking a road trip down the East Coast, sightseeing and eating (mostly eating). I'd also suggested taking a trip around Europe to see how horses are managed there; Johnny was less into this idea than I was.

I'd love to hear from you on your cruise experiences. Terrible? Marvelous? Hilarious? I'd also love to hear about what you did for your honeymoon (or what you'd like to do)!

Wedding Wednesday: Finding the right table decor

Remember those gorgeous trophy cup flower arrangements I was lusting after a few weeks ago? Turns out that finding good-looking trophy cups is an expensive endeavor! They start around $30 on eBay and Etsy; with 15 tables to decorate, that was definitely out of my price range.

My mother suggested I check with a local trophy store on prices for new loving cups; I didn't bother, as I was certain the cups in my price range would look chintzy and cheap. For good measure, I checked equestrian ribbon and trophy staple Hodges Badge- their silver trophies started at $55!

I'd resigned myself to tasteful vases last week when Johnny's mother and aunt came to visit. They've graciously volunteered to do most of the heavy lifting when it comes to planning. We visited the venue, and Johnny's aunt asked a few questions about table linens. We were referred to Party Perfect, a local store that the venue uses to rent just about everything.

Party Perfect appeared to be what a Pinterest wedding board looks like in the wild. There was burlap. There were mason jars. Vintage cake stands lurked behind brightly-colored antique glassware. A giant wooden "MR & MRS" cutout adorned a wall. I attempted to leave immediately, but was confused about which door was real and which door was really an upcycled accessory for a rustic and romantic wedding.

A helpful girl escorted us to the table linens section; I never knew there were so many shades of white, or that a bright white tablecloth would seriously clash with cream-colored hydrangeas. After finding a soft ivory table cloth, we tried a few different table runners and decided they all looked hideous. I didn't want to tables to be stark landscapes, so I went with mint green napkins for a pop of color. (To match the mint juleps, of course.)

I opted for silver chargers, because they reminded me of silver award plates. Somehow, all of the napkin rings were sparkly and hideous; I'd love to find some more of my cool snaffle bit napkin rings, but that kind of thing might get pricey on 150 napkins.

The coolest thing I found at the store were these faux-silver julep cups! The small cups will be serving their intended function: we'll be serving mint juleps in them. 

I loved the way the big cups looked, but when I sat down at the table, it was difficult to see and talk with someone on the opposite side.

Enter the crazing glaze silver bowl! I promise the bowl is more silver than it appears in this photo; the crazing makes it looked aged, with just the right amount of patina. The bowls are short, pretty, and remind me of these silver award bowls.

I'd like to incorporate some equestrian touches on the table, but I'm not sure where or what would work best. We aren't planning on assigned seating, so table numbers aren't necessary. Maybe photos of past Derby winners with a paragraph about them? Johnny's aunt suggested pictures of Johnny and I, but horses are so much more photogenic and interesting...

Thoughts? Suggestions?

Wedding Wednesday: Save the date

I finally got around to getting some save-the-date cards put together. I'm meeting with a printing shop in Tulsa this afternoon to discuss paper options, quantities, etc. 

I'm secretly relieved we haven't taken any engagement photos; I would have felt obligated to put them on the save-the-date card. It's not that I don't think Johnny, the horses, and I are an attractive bunch, but previous attempts at professional photos together haven't turned out particularly well. 

Invitations are next on my list; I've made a rough draft, but feel like it needs some adjustment.

What did y'all do for save-the-dates and invitations?

Wedding Wednesday: Rehearsal Dinner

I felt like we were pretty solid on the wedding planning front: venue, DJ, photographer, officiant all nailed down. Meeting with printer for stationery is set up. Meeting with venue about food is happening in January. Everything's pretty much done, right?

Not if you ask my mother or Johnny's mother. 

Currently, the crisis is our plan for the rehearsal dinner. The venue gives us something like two hours for rehearsal after 5 PM, so we weren't planning to have the dinner at the venue. We decided we'd like to have it at one of our favorite Tulsa restaurants, Siegi's Sausage Factory. Siegi's is a German restaurant with delicious food and a great beer selection. They have a private room that seats about 40 people. We're figuring on about 35 people attending the rehearsal dinner. Perfect!

After taking our mothers to eat at Siegi's while they were visiting, both had problems with our plan. Johnny's mother likes the food, but feels like the room will be too small for "visiting". My mother was ambivalent about the food; she thought it was okay, but wouldn't appeal to many guests. She also thought the private room was too small.

So here's my question for y'all: married people, at your rehearsal dinner, was there a ton of mingling? Did people want to get up and chit chat? Did everyone mostly stay put? Did anyone really care about the menu? 

(Note: Siegi's caters, but we'd rather have it in the restaurant because of the beer selection.)

Wedding Wednesday: Dress shopping

As I mentioned last week, my mother came to visit me. Aside from spending time with me, her only child, she wanted to visit the wedding venue and take me dress shopping.

Now y'all may not be able to tell from reading the blog, but I am not ultra-jazzed about the wedding. Of course, I'm excited to marry Johnny. I'm excited to get on Johnny's health insurance. I'm excited to throw a good party.

And that's how I see this event: a really big, really fun Kentucky Derby party. I want good food, good drinks, a great race, big hats, and fun time. I don't care who sits at what table. I don't particularly care what music is playing. I definitely don't care about weird traditions like a garter toss.

And I certainly don't care about having a big, elaborate, expensive dress. My mother, on the other hand...

Saturday afternoon we went to four dress shops. Some highlights:

• Wearing only my uncomfortable, Spanx-like special occasion undergarment while a total stranger buttoned, zipped, and stuffed me into gowns.
• Getting into a minor spat with my mother over what kind of dress I should wear. (Her opinion: the longer and frillier the better. Mine: opposite of that.)
• Reluctantly trying on a birdcage veil just to humor my mother. (Ridic.)
• Having a dress sales lady assure me that they could just 'chop off' the approximately 4 feet of excess length if I wanted it to be short. (Not reassuring.)
• Feeling completely silly standing on a little platform while sales ladies "oooh"ed and "aaah"ed over me. (I was definitely not looking THAT good.)
• Going to Macy's to look at cocktail dresses when my mother had a mini meltdown because I thought spending $900 + alteration fees was dumb.

It was maybe the least fun afternoon of my life. 

Married readers, how did you find your dress? Was it a Big Deal? Did anyone cry? Did you feel completely ridiculous trying on these things? 

Wedding Wednesday: Engagement photo ideas

Johnny and I have booked a wedding photographer (for the curious, it's Montag Photography in Tulsa), and the package we've chosen includes engagement photos. 

Now the last couple of times Johnny and I have had pictures taken of ourselves, it's been part of various family photo sessions. Three (or four) years ago, we had photos at Thanksgiving, which included Johnny uncomfortably posing with me next to a tree. Last year at Christmas, we had family photos on the beach and the photographer had to tell us more than once to stop touching the other's butt. (Where else would you rest your hand?!)

Clearly, we don't have a great track record when it comes to photography.

The photographer suggested having engagement photos done in October or November at a local landmark, Camp Loughridge. I know we definitely want to include Moe and Gina. But there are so many questions to answer:

• What should I wear?
• Should I get my hair did??
• Can we possibly get through this with pictures that don't look totally corny???
• Should Moe and Gina wear bridles or halters?

I am open to suggestions! You all have been so helpful with tips, ideas, suggestions, and feedback on previous Wedding Wednesday posts. I really, really appreciate all of you- you're the best blog friends a girl could ask for!

Wedding Wednesday: Decor

Johnny and I have made a lot of progress since my last Wedding Wednesday post: we've settled on a photographer and DJ, decided to rent a venue instead of having it at the horses' boarding barn (the logistics of getting tables, chairs, tents, food, etc. out there was a nightmare), and have decided where to have the rehearsal dinner. 

Now I feel like it's on to the fun stuff, like decorating for the wedding! There are so many great ideas out there (I'm looking at you, Pinterest). I definitely want an equestrian flair to the decorations; it'd be nice to incorporate the Derby's classic roses, but I don't want to go overboard on them because they're expensive.

Source: Rustic Wedding Chic

I really love the ribbons on the backs of these chairs. I have a lot of ribbons I could use for this, although ordering some custom ribbons from Hodges Badge is also an option. (Then I wouldn't have to worry about any of my precious satin getting ruined or going missing.) 

Source: Erica Ann Photography

For table centerpieces, I'm totally into these vintage trophy cups filled with flowers. However, finding them is sort of tricky- not to mention expensive! Ideas, anyone?

Source: Hostess With The Mostess Blog

We aren't having assigned seating at the reception (because no one wants to get stuck next to Great Uncle Everett who will advise you to steal the silverware), so we don't need a whole lot in the way of signage. These free printables from Hostess With The Mostess are cute, though- we could use them in the food and bar areas. I love that they aren't just red and white!

Source: Ice Magic

Remember when I mentioned something about an ice sculpture? Totally going for it. Since the reception will be mostly indoors, we don't have to worry about it melting super quickly. Plus, it's a freaking ice sculpture!! How could I not?!

Do y'all have any ideas about decor? The venue we've chosen is The Silo Event Center, which is sort of rustic without being overwhelmingly kitschy. (And it's horse-friendly, obvs.) 

Wedding Wednesday: Dress options

For the last couple of weeks, I've been contemplating what kind of dress to wear to my wedding. Here's what I'm thinking:

• Short
• Cream-colored or off-white (because white looks hideous on me)
• Some kind of fun detail
• Inexpensive

I'll admit I'm a little lost on anything more specific. Should I go with something lacy, like this lovely dress from Alfred Angelo? (It's out of my price range, but I'm sure I could find something similar.)

This ivory colored dress from Ann Taylor has pretty details. (Still fairly expensive, but perhaps I could find a coupon.) 

I've also thought about asking Johnny's mom if she'd be interested in making me a dress like this one from a McCall pattern. How cute would it look with a fascinator? (Not to mention Derby-appropriate!)

Accompanying the dress dilemma is another problem: shoes. I definitely don't want to wear cowboy boots, because ugh. I'm hesitant to wear sandals, because horses. And I'm on the fence about heels, because walking on grass. 

What do y'all think? Is a short dress tacky? Should I just buy something in seersucker? Is it weird to ask Johnny's mom about making a dress? (She does enjoy sewing and is a wonderful seamstress.) What kind of shoes should I wear? 

Wedding Wednesday

I thought it'd be fun to keep y'all updated on my Derby-themed wedding plans, and invite everyone to add their thoughts and suggestions in the comments section! Now, since no one wants to read about weddings and wedding planning all day, every day, I'll be limiting these posts to once a week, maximum. 

Today's topic is a big one: venue. Venue cost is a huge part of the budget and an important part of the party. We're inviting 134 people; most of them will be traveling to Tulsa from other states. We need a venue that is:

• Relatively close to Tulsa, so friends and family from out of town can get to and from easily.
• Large enough to accommodate our guests.
• Horse-friendly, as Moe and Gina will be attending (and will be a big part of pictures).

Of course, our first thought was to have the event at the horse's soon-to-be new home, Osage Hills Equestrian Center. There are some pros to this place: no cost to rent it, no real restrictions on setting things up, horses are definitely welcome. There are some concerns, though: the easiest place to set up large tents would be the hay meadow, which may not be cut in early May; renting tents is expensive; coordinating rentals between companies is often a nightmare; we would be responsible for set up and take-down.

Another venue we've considered is the White House Mansion in Tulsa. It's easily accessible from major highways in Tulsa, is horse-friendly, and the cost of the rental includes tables and chairs, as well as access to the indoor facilities in case of inclement weather. However, the rental cost is substantial (for us), and the logistics of getting the horses down there on Derby day might be difficult.

The final place we spoke with at the wedding show was The Silo Event Center in Tulsa. Another easily accessible and horse-friendly place, the Silo has indoor and outdoor options, which is good for Oklahoma's variable spring weather. There's also lodging on-site for out of town guests. However, the cost is relatively high, and there's not a lot of room for trailer parking.

Johnny and I are making a trip out to Osage Hills this weekend (he's never been), and we're planning to make a lot of notes on setup, logistics, and overall feasibility. If that venue won't work, it'll be off to the others to see what will suit our needs best!